But you didn't
by Zyuette
Summary: Gale's inner monologue from the point he meets a certain girl to the point that he ends up falling for her. Gadge. One-shot


**Disclaimer: I am no Suzanne Collins, though I would like to be one in the near future, and hence no... Hunger Games Trilogy does not belong to me. Maybe some other trilogy would do? You never know. **

* * *

I remember the day when I first saw you. You were in a yellow sundress, your hair pinned up in two ponytails with two yellow ribbons. Kinda ridiculous combination for a blond to begin with. Too much yellow. Even though I was hardly six, I knew it to be a pathetic combination.

You were frolicking around the entrance of the Justice Building. With your dad of course. Clutching his hand in yours for the fear of getting lost. My eyes never left you while my dad traded with the baker. It was for the fact that you stood out too much and I thought _don't we already have enough goofily dressing people running the nation that we need one for the district as well?_

Just then you turned and your eyes met mine. There was no hint of recognition there. Ofcourse not. Your first too. But something broke in me. The electrifying blue eyes paralyzing me to my spot.

And then I realised I was wrong. The combination wasn't bad at all. For it brought the blue of your eyes to everyone's attention. Not that it needed any.

I still stand by what I thought then was right. Yellow dress with yellow ribbons on a blond. Definitely a bad combination. But you were rather an exception. Because you made it yours entirely.

I thought about you for the rest of the day. And for the days to come. I never forgot you till the time I was introduced to you officially and I thought you would remember me too.

But you didn't.

* * *

Little did I know I was going to see you again in a circumstance this dire. I had hoped to see you, yes, but in a better situation than that that presented itself.

From the moment the peacekeeper had uttered those grave words, that completely destroyed my mother for the cheerful person she was, I changed forever.

It didn't take a wise eye to see that my mom was breaking underneath all the pretense she was putting up for me and my siblings' sake. Rory cried for days. He was completely aware of what was happening and knew my dad well enough to weep for him. Vick was rather confused, kept on asking when my dad was going to come to which my mom would swallow hard and reply with a brimming eye-"Soon honey, soon." He did cry for a day or two when he was old enough to figure out otherwise. Posy, on the other hand, wasn't well acquainted with my dad and never shed a tear. But I know deep down, that she would rather feel the pain we do than not know our dad.

My mom would only breakdown in the dark recesses of the the night. Weeping away from the everyone's sight. Only, she didn't escape mine. And on the day that I held her, sobbing hard against me, grabbing my shirt with all her strength, I tried to absorb all her pain. Take away all the agony she was suffering from. That was the day I promised to myself that I would never let anything like that inflict on my family again.

It was three days from then that I saw you. I had seen if I could get any job in the Seam and failed miserably. Searched the town on the second day and was more miserable. My family was starving and I was afraid that I might not be able to stand by my promise to my dad to keep them alive.

The third day I went to rummage in the woods. I had nothing to begin with. I simply loitered in the woods to see if I could get something, gather something. I didn't. Obviously to my knowledge, the booty was seated much deeper into the woods. But frankly, I was rather afraid to forage the deeper lands.

Defeated I came back to the fence, crawled underneath it and was about to leave when I heard a ruffling sound to my left. That's when I came upon the strawberry bush. Your strawberry bush. It was hidden from the general landscape by quite a thick foliage. I wondered why anyone didn't ever notice it.

A small girl was bent on her knees near the bush and was selfishly nibbling on the strawberry in her hands. When I coughed loudly, she gasped and turned around quickly, the strawberry juice running down her chin.

Yes, the girl was you to answer the question.

You turned as red as the strawberry in your hands and a minute or two later smiled wide, showing your pearly white stained with the strawberry juice.

"Hi. My name is Madge," you said, extending your empty hand ,out of the two you had, forward only to retract it back when I didn't reciprocate it.

No one had talked to me for those three days. Not in the school, not around the seam. Thought I might breakdown or something. You were the first one to talk to me in three days.

"I thought no one knew of this place," you spoke up. I simply stared. You were fidgeting, nervous energy coursing through you for no reasons known to me. "I'll just... um... go," you got up quickly, embarrassed and left the place altogether.

I watched you leave because I was mesmerized to meet you again but didn't have it in me to respond when I was dulled to my core by the tragedies inflicted upon me.

I turned to look at the strawberry bush and my eyes landed on the ripest, most brightest strawberry of the bush. It gave me hope. That I could if I will hard to support my family. You gave me hope to live on.

I started to come to the bush everyday. To get the strawberries of course. But mostly in the hopes to meet you again. Every single day for the next month I came to that place alone and waited an hour for you to come.

But you didn't.

* * *

One month after my father's death, my family was summoned to the Justice Building. We were made to stand in front of the entire population of District 12 along with the families of those who had lost their loved ones in the mine explosion.

I stood in the front of my family, marking myself as the next head, to receive the medal of valor.

I was the last in the line. Your dad made his way down the entire line, greeting everyone, expressing his grief at lost of the family he was talking to, you in tow.

When your dad came up to me, I did all but talk. I stood tall, determined to not cry because I wasn't a cry baby, nodded, shook hands and bowed down when he presented me with the medal but I never saw him in the eye. I didn't because I knew I would end up seeing the one thing I had been seeing in everyone when they would look at me.

Pity.

I would endure it from the rest, but from your father was unbearable. Because I blamed him for my loss. I blamed the Capitol and he was the only thing that stood for it in this god-forsaken district. Your dad moved onto giving a speech to honour the dead and I couldn't help but snort. That's when you abruptly turned to look at me and I was caught off guard because I saw you, right in the eye. And I was all set to unleash my fury in return to the pity in your glance you would throw my way. I expected nothing but for you to look at me with disgust and pity.

But you didn't.

* * *

After that, I started to notice you now and then. Not like I didn't before but it's doubtful really because you started to show up everywhere. In the square, in the corridors of the school, you didn't spare me with your presence.

It kinda drove me up the wall. But I was still indecisive. After my father's death, I became rather... mad. Scornful. Everything triggered me, rubbed me the wrong way. And you were no exception to that.

I hated you, loathed you for you stood a representative to the one thing I hated the most. The fire of hatred burned brighter to the point that it threatened to consume me and your first reaping was the day when fuel was added to the fire.

You had one entry and Katniss had four. That in itself reflected the unfairness of the system and it made me want to be madder at you.

Selfishly but yes, for a moment I wanted you to get reaped as I watched you stand beside Katniss, biting your nails, staring hard at your polished shoes. Katniss, who rather had more entries than you stood tall and determined and just for a moment I respected that more than your cowardice. But then Effie Trinket, in her ridiculous high pitched capitol accent, uttered a name that wasn't Katniss' or your's and Katniss heaved a sigh of relief. I expected you to do the same.

But you didn't.

* * *

Glint of the gold on your dress was the first thing that caught my eyes and I was like _how much would that be sold for?_ Seam mentality, I assume.

This time it was a white dress, something that could be sold for about the price of breads sustaining my family of five for two months. I smiled, smugly, and I guess that was what caught _your_ eye because then you looked at me and for the faintest of time, I saw sadness reflected in them. Maybe I was too hard on you.

My eyes caught on the pink ribbon in your hair.

No. I wasn't. You had something that Posy had been asking for _months_ and it did me in.

"Pretty dress," I said and in fact it was a pretty one. It could have had been a genuine comment on my part if it wasn't for the underlying malicious tone I supplied it with.

That was the first time I saw the fire in your eyes, directed at me. I was surprised for the fact that you had it in you to face me. I was wrong, again.

"Well, if I end up going to the Capitol, I want to look nice, don't I?" That was wrong. A sentence that wasn't meant to come from you. And just for a second I was confused, ended up thinking you _meant_ it. But then I caught the mischievous smile on you and was rather amused.

You had it in you, I figured. But then you shouldn't. There's no reason for _you _to be angry about and the fact that you were made me more angrier.

"You won't be going to the Capitol," I said my eyes catching on the glinting gold again before continuing, "What can you have? Five entries? I had six when I was just twelve years old."

"It's not her fault," Katniss spoke up and the fact that she decided to stand for you instead of me despite knowing the hardships we face from which you are spared rubbed me the wrong way and all I could do was mutter, "No, it's no one's fault. Just the way it is."

And I thought you would have a smart retort to that. I was all set to fight you on that because no matter what, there's no way in hell I was going down in a fight that was regarded our socio-economic differences.

But you didn't.

* * *

I knew much before you called out my name to announce your presence that it was you. It does not take long for me to differentiate the regular noises and the additional ones that stand out. And you were pretty noisy to say the least.

"Gale?" You spoke up and I didn't take me more than a second to find that fine thread of hesitance. You were afraid to approach me. Anger crept up, making a deadly combination with longing.

"What do you want Undersee?"

"Just to tell you one was what it took," I was furious thinking, _is_ _she being sarcastic?_ I turn around to blow a gasket when I see you looking at me with not pity but longing. That's when I realised I wasn't the only one who lost a friend today. So did you. So I turned back and gazed back into the valley.

I felt something shift beside me and you materialised without a word, gazing back into the valley. It does elude me, the fact that you might have been there to after all look after me but then again you can't be expecting things like that to follow through with me. Anger with the sudden procession of events and the realisation that the world does _not_ work the way I thought, I stood up and left.

For one annoying moment I thought you did follow me back to the district like a lost kitty needing a way.

But you didn't.

* * *

It was the night when Peeta and Katniss kissed. In the cave. None of it for the games. And till now it had been for the games. Any guy with half as much of a brain could tell. But this wasn't one of their stage performances. And I saw right through it. I felt my heart rip out of my chest and all I could think was _why him?_ I had dibs on her first (I know it's childish calling dibs on Katniss' love but...) and I had known her longer. Shared a much deeper bond and yet that boy from yesterday takes her away from me. I wasn't heartbroken, I was too naive to confuse pure anger with betrayal, I was angry. That she would prefer him over me. And I sought out the only thing that would get me to calm down.

You.

So in the middle of the night, trudging through the dark silhouettes of the buildings, I came up to your house, right under your window and threw a stone at it. I debated throwing a second one but then your window lighted up and your shadow appeared before you poked your head out.

Your eyes widened in surprise and you whispered furiously, "What are you doing here?" and all I could do was manage a shrug. You gave a pointed look to me and I thought it was pretty sexy combined with your bed hair and sleepy eyes and then you closed your window.

I panicked. I thought you were angry and went back to sleep and I started to look around for a proper tree to scale when the creaking of the backdoor stopped me short.

You came out, a thin satin robe hung around you like a shroud and raised an eyebrow, eager to know why I was here and I stood there dumb founded, not knowing it myself. So you simply sighed and walked up to the swing in your backyard and patted the space beside you that I took without hesitation.

And we talked. Talked about everything that was and is our life, except for anything regarding the games, pretending as if games were a mere figment of imagination, a bad one and the wonderful thing was... they actually became one. I completely forgot about them as I learned your distaste for the Capitol, your favourite colour being red and your crush on me.

That was rather involuntary. Your uttered it out by chance and realising what you had just said, blushed a crimson red. The same way you did when we talked for the first time. And it took me back to that moment of enlightenment and the hope you gave me.

Trapped in that moment of light, I leaned in and gently kissed you. Feeling the softness of your lips against mine for the first time. It took my breath away and I pulled away abruptly thinking you would feel insulted. That I disregarded the conventions of personal space and good manners.

But you didn't.

* * *

Fierce fire crawling up my back. Followed by the intense burning feeling left after the whip falls across my back. I remember grunting loudly, the sound echoing across the square, intermingling with the lashing noises of the whip. The heavy scent of blood and the red colour flashing before my eyes before everything turning to black.

And yet the pain never leaves. Rather, it amplifies as the realisation of the situation kicks in. The humiliation, the unconditional surrender to the terms and conditions of the Capitol and somewhere in the middle of all the torture, your painful eyes meeting mine was too much to bear and though I remained limp on the outside I felt myself screaming more and more with every second passing.

I reminiscence feeling that intense sense of burning and the immediate calm that follows when the burning is subsided by the splash of cold water and I realise in the midst of it all, I heard your voice. I thought I was hallucinating, admitting yes that I have been dreaming a lot about you as of late, that I was hearing your voice and yet knowing it was just make-belief I still felt relief wash through me. Because it was you.

Later on when I was set free from the confined and mandatory bed rest, the first thing I did was seek you out, wanted to talk to you. Hear your voice for real. I hadn't talked to you for a long time. Guiltily so, I completely forgot about you the minute Katniss came back because I had immediate troubles to look after. With the growing void between me and Katniss, I was too busy mending that relationship to have forgotten about this. And it made it more important that I talk to you, apologize for being a jackass and get us where we were.

Fortune seemed to smile upon me because I saw you right then at that moment, walking out of the general store a couple of metres from where I stood. I stood there, waiting for you to notice me and as soon as you did, I could feel myself getting a bit lighter, happier and I thought so would you.

But you didn't.

* * *

It wasn't until I learned about the morphling that I decided that enough was enough and that you had ignored me all that you could and I, insanely, let you do that thinking there was no other alternative. I thought it was my fault and it is, not saying it wasn't, and that it rested upon you whether you wanted the nameless relationship we shared to exist now because you owned that right after terrible judgement on my part.

Adding onto it, I thought you did actually end it and I decided to leave you alone when my mom accidentally told me to respect you on my constant pestering about you being a snob and a brat, more of which was to convince me that you were what you weren't. On pressing her hard on it, she gave in and told me the entire thing and I came running after you.

It didn't take you long to materialize from the backdoor and for me to press you up right against it and somehow, in the heat of the moment, we ended up in your bed, our breaths mingling, muffled sounds filling the silence of the room. Your soft voice occasionally screaming my name out in ways that turned me on. Your dad was in the Justice Building. And that was the one night when I was certain of something for the first time in my life. Certain that the girl with the mockingjay pin had taken my heart. That the blond girl below me, staring wide eyed at me, was the kind of girl who I wanted to spend my entire life with. That what I had mistaken for hatred my entire life was nothing but love and that I had crossed the thin line that demarcated the feelings of love and hate a long time ago.

In the morning when I woke up, I found you lying awake. Your back against my chest, eyes gazing out the window. I shuffled a little, for you to know that I was awake, and you turned to face me. You were silent and looked into my eyes and I thought it was a mistake. To you. Not to me. I thought you would look at me as if I was a mistake and you regretted this moment together.

But you didn't.

* * *

My thoughts were muddled, couldn't get anything straight, a gnawing feeling settled in my stomach as I blindly raced for your house in the Town. I had got my family to evacuate the Seam and instructed Rory to do the same with the Everdeens and go for the meadows.

I do hold myself to guilt when I say I didn't realize you were the reason my stomach was gnawing till I saw the patch of foliage that covers the strawberry bush. I had forgotten about you entirely when the imminent threat to my family's safety nudged me into action. You do realise that it was more of a reflex for me when my family is concerned.

I still remember, you appeared out of the smoke as if making a dramatic entrance. I know it sounds childish but take it that way from a guy in love. But then you pulled me out of my thoughts by thrusting a kid into my arms, shouting at me to take her with me.

You turned to rush back into the smoke and ash when I pulled you short, grabbing hold of your wrist. You gasped suddenly and turned and I pulled you close, kissing you hard, wanting it to surprise you, conveying what I felt for you. Instead, it took _me _by surprise when you responded, just as enthusiastic or maybe more. I don't know. Maybe I imagined the passion that flew in between us. Maybe I didn't. All I could think or really _feel _was the pressure of your hands, resting softly against my chest, curling slowly. I vaguely remember my grip on you tightening for a second before pulling back to gaze into your liquid orbs.

"I love you," you said nearly breathless and I was equally overjoyed to see the love within me reflect in you.

Someone pushed us by and we were brought roughly back to the stark reality. Your eyes turned cold before you struggled with my grip on your hand.

"Come back," I asked. One thing. I asked for one thing.

And with the faintest of smile, your eyes crinkling you said, "I will,"

And I waited. I waited for an hour or two. I think I waited for three days outside the demarcations of the District 12's fence.

I remember my mother trying to coax me to eat something, drink something, _talk _something but I didn't because I waited for you. I wouldn't eat until it was sure you were well fed for, wouldn't drink until I knew you were safe and sound and drinking too, wouldn't talk when it wasn't with you. I waited for you to come.

But you didn't.

* * *

**A/N:- I came up with this idea when I was going through some of my post on Facebook. I hope you guys like it and are not bored with the Gadge I present at all coz one more story is coming your way. Don't know when I will start posting that one, but I will completely complete it before I start posting it.**

**Would love to know your thoughts on this one!**


End file.
